October is darkness and coffee. October is long and foggy, October is nostalgia, a faded shade from the summer. October is a pleasant silence, October is like that love that never managed to happen to you. But October always happens to you, it comes once a year – cold, sticky, accused of autumn …
Because a person’s soul cannot endure more than one October a year. Look, another April would be great, and why not August, even September, but not October. It must be unique. It has to be just as poetic, narcissistic, inspiring. October brings me sadness, makes me ask myself a lot of questions. “What if …?”, “How to?”, “What would happen if?” If, if, if … October makes me wonder, to be insecure, to be smaller. This month is like an old friend you haven’t seen in a long time. You long to tell him so many things, to go touch him, to peer into his eyes, and when that finally becomes a reality you see … his eyes are the same, but the way I look at him changes so much. .. And it hurts. It hurts! It hurts from the unexperienced thing that could have ever happened, it hurts from the fact that you haven’t met so many people you should have met, it hurts because of the pain itself because it is part of you and part of October. It is gloomy outside, the time in my soul even more. The wind blows relentlessly and scatters my thoughts into thousands of pieces. Will we survive this October as well? The answer is always yes. Because autumn always leaves both our life and our soul.
Until then, we have no choice but to take shelter in the warmth of our own hope and wait for the storms of sorrow to pass. Because, in the end, there is only one October and we need it to be reborn.
